While growing up cooking was not my favorite sport and to be honest with you, I really only enjoy cooking every once in a while. I think I was born to have a private cook, however I just haven't gotten the money to hire one. Thank God my husband likes to cook. By the way, that's not a picture of my kitchen. Maybe if I had a kitchen like that I would cook more. Whatever my husband says. Anyway, this blog is not really about cooking and the kitchen it's about getting involved in stuff that we may not be able to handle.
Being a stepmom is one of those things. I have heard on numerous occasions that being a stepmom was the hardest job/role some women have ever had to handle in their lives. Having been a stepmom for over 12 years I must concur. Yes I am pretty much over the hump and am doing quite well in the role now, but it wasn't always that way.
While doing a webcast interview with Jim and Teresa Adams (Twitter @FamMatters1st) on my book "One Plus One Equals Ten", Jim commented that reading my book would scare people out of becoming a stepfamily. Because data says that 2 out of 3 remarriages involving children from a previous relationship are destined to fail, there are some people who may not be able to handle the pressures of being in a stepfamily. I am not being harsh, but the last thing you want to do is end up back in divorce court.
I wish I could count the number of times I have heard women say, "Where were you ten years ago before my marriage failed? " Others have commented, "Being a stepmom was not for me because there were too many issues." Still others have said, "If I had it to do over again, I would have waited until his children were grown or I would have not married a man with children."
A while back Jada Pinkett Smith posted a letter on Facebook she had written to a friend who was complaining about being a stepmom. Basically, Jada responded with.... Girlfriend, you knew he had kids when you married him so put on your big girl pants and figure out how to make it work. If you have watched Jada's posts, you see that she is making it work. I don't agree with everything she does but she is rocking the stepmom role.
The question is... Are some women not cut out to be stepmoms? Should you hold off until the children are grown? What do you think?
Janice R Love, Author
First Lady, Mom, Stepmom and Divorce Ministry Coach