A couple of weeks ago I got a new phone. Even though I just upgraded my I-phones, I had to start all over again loading the information into the new phone. I exported all of the data from my old phone to the computer and then once I had the new phone, I reloaded all of the information onto the new device. Most of it came over okay, but there were a few apps that required me to put my password back in which I had actually forgot. Some data came over in duplicates and now I have at least four of all of my contacts. Switching over could have been traumatic if I had not backed up my data. My husband thought about switching from an android to an I-phone, but he was concerned about losing everything and having to learn new technology.
In the last week I have encountered many people who are in phases of their life that requires them to start over. A friend is pregnant and didn't think she would have any more kids. She didn't save anything from the birth of her son who is now six years old. Also this is her first girl. She mentioned having to start all over again.
Our oldest daughter got married last weekend and today she and her hubby are on their way to another state, eleven hours away to their new home. She packed up most of her clothes and the rest of her belongings she left here . She is starting over in several ways as she must adjust to being married, being in a new city and finding a new job. I am expecting to hear from her often over the next several weeks.
Our youngest son finished high school this past May and will be heading to college next month. He is starting over with his grades and meeting new friends and starting over with a new football team. A friend's son experienced a divorce and is having a hard time financially. He recently filed bankruptcy and lost everything including his car and his home. He is starting over from scratch as they say.
Starting over can be good or bad. When changes are sometimes forced upon us, we are not so happy with having to start over again, such as losing everything we own for instance in a fire or due to repossession. Other new starts are welcome such as graduation from high school and /or college or getting a promotion or new job. Here are a few tips to help you to be successful when you are starting all over again.
1. Keep a positive attitude - Sometimes, attitude makes all the difference in the world. Avoid excessive anger at yourself and those you may feel responsible for your dilemma. Don't play the victim role and blame others for the changes in your life.
2. Be optimistic - Look for the opportunities in the change rather than listing all of the things you have lost. When we consider what we have rather than brood over what we have lost, our future looks brighter.
3. Plan to be successful - Without a vision and a plan we are leaving our future to chance. Why not set some goals and come up with a plan to achieve them. You may have to start with daily goals and work your way up to longer term goals.
4. Determine your lessons learned - If you are starting over again due to the end of a relationship, take a good hard look at your experiences and situation and learn from them. Realizing where you made the mistakes the first time may prevent you from being in the same situation.
5. Express gratitude for the new opportunity - Sometimes starting over is the best thing that can happen to us. Be grateful for a new beginning and embrace the opportunity for change and better outcomes.
I am grateful for my new I-phone, because I get the chance to learn some new features that will help me in the long run. I am excited about our future empty nest and excited that we didn't lose a daughter but gained a son-in law. See how it works? Give it a try!
Janice R Love, Author
First Lady, Mom, Stepmom and Divorce Ministry Coach